Coping with Meltdowns at 40,000 Feet: A Family Travel Guide for Parents of Neurodiverse

So you’ve booked your holiday, you’ve spent hours researching the ideal destination, with the perfect hotel. You’ve planned activities that you’re pretty sure they will be able to cope with but enjoy. You know that this won’t be easy, but you’re quietly confident they can do it.

## Understanding the Challenges: Why Flights Can Be Overwhelming for Neurodiverse Children

The only thing is the flight. You're concerned it might be overwhelming. As a parent of a neurodiverse child, you know their triggers (most of the time), whether it’s sensory overload, new experiences, crowds—the list is endless. This means your family experience will always be unique to you.

Before any new experience, whether it’s a holiday, hospital appointment, or a new class at school, it’s always worth trying to identify what triggers them. Then you can work on supporting them.

For my child, he always finds comfort in the familiar. So, I start introducing new things slowly. If we were going on a plane for the first time, I would casually start talking about planes; for instance, when we are outside, I would show him planes in the sky and talk about people going on holidays, being really positive about it.

Next, I would take him on a train and talk about people using different modes of transport. I know the noise and large number of people may trigger him, as well as the sensation of moving.

YouTube is a great resource. We’ve spent hours watching planes and trains; for him, he always copes better when he knows what to expect. I also took him to a local airport museum, where he was able to look around a plane and sit in a plane seat.

## Keeping Calm Before Takeoff: Tips for a Smooth Travel Experience

Now, after all this preparation, you might think it should be plain sailing; hopefully, it will be. But for us, the importance of keeping calm should never be underestimated! Trying to keep to a familiar schedule is essential; always consider this when booking flights. Talking through what to expect can also help, or even a visual timetable using resources they are familiar with. Noise-canceling headphones can definitely help if they are tolerated.

So, you’ve managed to successfully navigate the airport and board the plane. You’re keeping them distracted with sensory toys, tablets, coloring books, and snacks. All seems to be going well, and you start relaxing. Then, you glance over and notice the familiar signs of a meltdown. We have all been there—in the supermarket, church, doctor’s appointments—but the anxiety for parents at 40,000 feet is another level.

## Managing Meltdowns: Strategies for Staying Calm in the Air

So what should you do? First, stay calm. You know how children pick up on your anxieties. Try switching activities or offering a snack or a drink. Use calming strategies such as breathing exercises or grounding techniques. Remember the plan you made? Follow the steps; every child is different and will respond differently to this situation. I found walking up and down the aisle helped, and I also informed the air hostess of what was happening. Remember, air hostesses are trained to deal with any number of crises, so hopefully, they will be able to offer some support, possibly a move to a quieter part of the plane.

Now, you’ve tried all your strategies, activities, and snacks, and nothing is going to prevent this meltdown. So what do you do? Get your child as safe as possible and try to remain relaxed and reassure your child, just like you would at home. But you’re worried about what the other passengers will think. Well, just remember, you’re unlikely to ever see any of these passengers again, and in reality, their opinion of you or your parenting skills doesn’t matter.

So remember to be prepared, have a clear plan of what you are going to do, and try to plan for all eventualities. Spend some time researching your child’s triggers and definitely be over-prepared. After the journey, take some time to reflect on what went well and what didn’t, just so you can prepare for your next adventure.